I am at the diner I visit once a week, typically on Wednesday evenings – the time of the week when I need some music to push me through.
I sit in the booth I usually sit in, the one near the back of the room where no one will hardly ever notice my presence. I sit scanning the room, corner by corner, desiring some sort of excitement.
A white girl – I feel the word "lady" would best suit her – sits across in a booth far away.
Her hair is blonde and silky – her dress is ruffled with lace and embroidered with flower patterns.
She glances across the window. I'm certain she would attract quite a few lads, I can hardly imagine guys letting the pretty doll be by herself.
Just as I thought, enters a guy – he sits next to her. Or rather, he pushes her across the booth and wraps his muscular, tan arms around her shoulder. Her delicate, silky hair tangles between his bulky, masculine limbs.
He's like a stallion – wild and sweaty. I see his eyes, probably not sober, but full of spirit only youth (and a certain type of youth) can have. I see in his eyes a free soul – perhaps he's from California, the wild ones all go west – longing to be unleashed. I see a young boy thirsty for the female touch, untamed and ready to run.
But his eyes are hollow. They are full of spirit – they are free. But they are hollow.
He rubs his face against her beautiful, painted white skin.
"Camille, I'll be right back." he whispers.
She smiles.
But I see the shadow behind her grin.
As he leaves her side, she returns her gaze to the window.
I can see her thin, red lips purse together.
And I see her eyes.
They are not frowning.
But her eyes, too, are hollow. They long for a purpose. A family. A settled life.
He returns – and she smiles.
But I see the shadow between her smile.
She glances across – I think she noticed that I've been observing her for the past few minutes.
She throws me a cold, piercing glare.
And I know. Yes, it's because of my skin. It's because of my color.
But I know it's more than that.
She's been caught. She's exposed. She's naked.
I've seen the shadow behind the smile.
I've seen her eyes.
I've seen how empty they are.
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